Showing posts with label things I learned about life. Show all posts
Showing posts with label things I learned about life. Show all posts

October 31, 2011

Of Late Fees and Beatitudes

We bought a stove after eight months of cooking with two burners and having no oven. It was a good deal: half price, discounted, discontinued, last one in stock. We could not have done better! And then the clerk offered us an even steeper discount if we signed up for the credit card. We are fiscally conservative and owe no credit card debt. So we did it. And promptly paid the balance when the payment came due.

And then came the perfect storm.

The payment, while made on time, was just late enough in the day that it went through the following business day, accruing a slight penalty, which we did not know we had because we had mistakenly signed up for paperless billing.  But we paid in full. No bill, no worries, right?

Except for the automated phone calls. “Sorry we missed you. Please call us about your Sears card” every time I picked up the phone. You didn’t miss me! Here I am! Talk to me! Since nobody would talk, I assumed it was another offer. More credit. Lower rates. We didn’t need either. I didn’t call.

No e-mails either. I pay the bills in our house and everything goes to my e-mail account. No e-mails, no worries, right?

Except when Matt finally called to please ask that we no longer receive the annoying daily phone calls we found out the slight penalty had snowballed three months worth of interest. Frustrated, he used his “ma’am” voice to explain clearly and without a doubt that we had NO idea of the penalty, that we had NO idea what the phone calls were about and that we would have paid the bill right away IF we had known about it. They waved the fee and gave us the benefit of the doubt. 

Problem solved, right?

Except it was still the perfect storm.

A month later we found out our bank would start charging $5 a month for the use of the debit card unless you had multiple types of accounts with them. We’d been wanting to re-finance so it was the right time to switch mortgages and avoid silly monthly fees.

So Matt went to the bank confident in our great credit and little debt to be told we had a small blemish that kept us from the best possible rates. No guesses here: the Sears card small late fee on a very expensive stove.

We called Sears, we raged and ranted, we reminded them of what we’d bought, that this was ludicrous over such a small amount, that we did not know about the fee, and on and on. They politely explained they would send it to their referral department and let us know.  “By the way,” they said, “it probably won’t get changed because it is not the bank’s error. But you can try…” Hopes dashed. This blemish would stay on our credit for seven years. So much for good rates for a while…

So what do Christians do when in trouble? We asked our church to pray. And they did. But I didn’t hold much hope because, after all, we had made a mistake and well, when you don’t pay your bill you get stuck with the bill collectors. Is God able to take care of such silliness? Sure, but He would take care of our needs either way, so why not let life take its course? Anyway, that’s theology for another day.

In any case, I happened to mention to Matt while we waited for the dreaded results that Sears should have at least sent us an e-mail reminder that we had a paperless bill. Every other company does and…that’s when he said: “Maybe they did…” Oh. No. Please. No. They did. To his e-mail. Not mine. Because he set up the account. Not me, as usually happens. 

This, of course, ensued a fight. “Why would you give them your e-mail?” “Why would not you NOT open messages from Sears?” “Why…why…why…” I walked away angry and in my room the Lord spoke to me: Are you perfect? Do you not make mistakes? Has he not forgiven you much?

Convicted I came back and hugged him: “We’ll get through this. We’ll figure it out. I’m sorry I acted like that.” We talked, we forgave each other, and we discussed the next step on our plan without the re-financing. No need. Sears called on Friday: blemish cleared against all odds! Praise Jesus for his faithfulness.

Sunday I was sitting in church listening to my sweet husband preach on the text of the week: Blessed are the merciful, for they will be shown mercy (Matthew 5: 7) and a light went on in my soul. God will not be manipulated by us. Nothing we do will change his mind if his mind is made. But like any loving father, He is true to his word.

There was no earthly chance of us getting that mark off of our credit. Sears did everything right and we did everything wrong, however innocently. It was divine intervention, of that I’m sure, because even the manager said it would never happen. And most often than not, God does not explain himself to me. I don’t know why at times He intervenes and why at times He does not.

But He explained this one:

We were shown mercy. Pure, simple mercy. And I understood exactly why.

We made the choice to stand together as a team against this problem rather than let it divide us, we quit fighting and forgave each other’s part of the blame.

We showed mercy to each other that afternoon.

We didn’t know at the time that the way we approached this hurdle would define its outcome, and had we known, it would have defiled the purity of the intentions, but I am convinced that had we reacted in a way less pleasing to the Lord we would still be stuck with the blemish. For seven more years.

Blessed are the merciful for they will be shown mercy. Those are not empty words but one of the many promises He has made to us that we can trust and live by. 

August 13, 2011

The Eye of the Beholder

Joining with Lisa-Jo on her (slightly longer than) Five Minute Friday for: Beauty.
Is beauty really in the eye of the beholder?
On a bad hair day, when my curls won’t stay, when the make-up no longer glides smoothly on less-than-firm eyelids, when the skin does not glow like it used to, she looks at me while I try to work magic in front of the mirror feeling less than successful, and she exclaims with admiration I cannot understand:
You are so beautiful!
She observes me, she imitates me, she marvels at me. She wants to look like me, smell like me, dress like me. She asks to borrow my perfume, my jewelry, my shoes.
I am the princess in her fairy tales, Beauty and Cinderella, the belle of her ball.
And I believe her.
In her eyes I’m beautiful. She doesn’t know about perfect weight, perfect features, perfect hair. She loves me and her love transforms me into the lovely creature she thinks I am.   
And she has changed me.
I no longer complain about my hair.
She is listening.
I no longer fuss about my weight.
She is watching.
I no longer berate my features.
I want to teach her the One who made us both makes no mistakes.
I know this awe I inspire in her won’t last forever. She is only five. But for now, I don’t have to look in the mirror to see beauty reflected back at me.
I just look into her eyes.

April 13, 2011

In just one minute.

Last week was my birthday.
It was a busy birthday. Like all Wednesdays it was full, it was fast, and a little furious. Teaching three-year-olds in the morning, ballet class and errands in the afternoon, Bible study at night, praise practice to end the day.
It was a blessed birthday. The kids made me cards, signed their names and drew their marks. Matt gave me a sewing organizer that I desperately needed and a set of headphones for running that actually stay in my funny-shaped ear holes.
It was a good birthday.  My hubby and I had some time alone to grab lunch thanks to a dear friend, and spent an hour talking and walking down the mall aisles hand in hand, without counting heads and holding little hands.
It was also a humbling birthday and one to learn a good lesson about loving well .
You know how Facebook declares your birth date to the world? Mine was posted as well.
And this year I was overwhelmed with the amount of people from all of the paths of my life who took time off their busy day to write a happy birthday note on my wall.
See, the thing is you can see a birthday and you can choose to ignore it. I know I often do. I also know it only takes a minute to click on someone’s wall and wish them a good day.
But that’s just it: it takes a minute and, in my busy day, a minute is gold.
It is a minute less I have to browse through my close friends’ pages and catch up on their lives.
It is a minute less for me to think of a clever status to post so that I get lots of comments.
So it's a lost minute.
It is a lost minute to wish that person I had not seen/talked to/interacted with in ages a happy birthday. Will they even notice or care if I don’t? I wonder.
Until I was that person.
I don’t know why this year in particular the response was so widespread. I really don’t. But I do know this: I felt loved, remembered, cherished, blessed.
Amazing how that one minute these people took to click, write, click again made a difference to a stay-at-home mom who sometimes wonders if she has disappeared from the face of the earth now that she is not “out” in the world.
And it made me think that perhaps I pass on opportunities daily to take one minute to make someone’s day with a quick e-mail, a short wall message, a comment on a blog, a brief card in the mail.
Just to say: I remember you, I love you, I cherish you, I've been blessed by you.
It only takes one minute to remind someone they matter to the world.
Do you have a minute today?